Choir Notes

Good Fathering
From Music and The Spoken Word
Dleivered by: Lloyd D. Newell • Program 4007

The story is told of a father who overheard his son praying, “Dear God, make me the kind of man my daddy is.” Later that night, the father prayed, “Dear God, make me the kind of man my son needs me to be.”

Good fathering is hard work, the most important kind of work men can do. Yet studies have shown that the average father spends less than 30 minutes a week talking with his children.1 So many good and worthwhile things call out for time and attention. But what could be more worthwhile than nurturing a relationship with a child?

What kind of man do children need their fathers to be? Most children need less of what a father’s money can buy and more of his time. They need his consistent presence. Fathers can help to foster creativity and self-worth, moral standards and social skills, awareness of the world and the confidence to achieve worthy goals. Good fathers combine strength with humility, great expectations with caring concern. They encourage independence and industry, yet they’re gentle enough to cry, laugh, and walk hand-in-hand with a child.

This kind of fathering is best done over the course of countless one-on-one moments, accumulated over many years. If we could only gaze into the future, we would see how precious such moments are, how quickly they pass. It seems that only yesterday a teenager was a toddler, a graduate was a first grader, a new father was a child.

Soon the seasons pass,
Like the rivers and their rapid flow;
But loving fathers
Always reap the love they freely sow.

The years come and go;
But in the heart of every good father,
A child remains so
Dear: once a hand, always a heart to hold.

1 See Mary Pipher, The Shelter of Each Other: Rebuilding Our Families (1996), 231