The Warm Embers of Love
From Music and the Spoken Word
Delivered By: Lloyd D. Newell • Program 4366
Most marriages start out like a
glowing fire, full of warmth and light. But anyone who has been married
for very long knows that keeping a marriage burning strong and healthy
takes effort and commitment. Like a fire, love needs constant attention
and nurturing through words and acts of affection and selflessness.
There are as many ways to strengthen a
marriage as there are married couples—the key is to find what works for
you. One couple found that a daily walk gave them opportunity to talk,
share feelings, and stay close. Another couple leaves little notes for
each other every day. Usually it’s just a line or two, but it helps them
remember why and how they love each other. Another couple hangs play
tickets or other reminders of their upcoming dates where they both can
see them. All week long, they look forward to the time they will share
together, just the two of them.
You’re never done strengthening your
marriage. A lifetime of daily choices, large and small, are needed to
fuel the embers of loyalty and love. "Support your [spouse’s] values,
goals and dreams, and greet his or her good news with interest and
delight,” says one expert. She suggests that even a fire that seems to
have gone out can be rekindled with intentional caring, compassion, and
companionship. "A marriage that has been marred by negative, angry or
hurtful remarks can often be rescued by filling the home with words and
actions that elicit positive emotions.”1
It need not be any more complicated
than asking ourselves each day, "What can I do for a few minutes today
to make my sweetheart’s life better?” Simple actions, like sincerely
listening, helping out, sharing an amusing event, smiling, or being
good-humored, can rekindle the embers of love. In this way we live by
the homespun wisdom of the familiar counsel "Choose your love; love your
choice.”
1 Jane E. Brody, "That Loving Feeling Takes a Lot of Work,” New York Times, Jan. 14, 2013, http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/01/14/that-loving-feeling-takes-a-lot-of-work.
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