Wishing You Well

"I'm First!"

My children are constantly fighting over who is first. HELP!

1. Validate the feelings of both children. "You both seem angry. Something must have happened."

2. Let the children know THEY have a problem, and the adult will help them solve it if they are willing. "It seems like you two have a problem."

3. Define the problem for the children. Do not include first. Ex. "The problem is you both wanted to sit in the same seat."

4. Facilitate the children's attempt to come up with solutions. "How do you two think you can work this out?" If the children are not ready to let go of the power struggle to be first, simply remove the item or the children from the space until they are ready to solve the real problem.

Something helpful you can do today:

Take time to evaluate the emphasis you are putting on being first in your home or classroom. 

Ex. "Who can clean up first?" "The children who are sitting quietly will line up first." "Last one to the car is a rotten egg!"

1 comment:

milecar said...

French food dictionary balanced in my palms, like a slab of slate flecked with twinkly mica. The weight felt substantial. It smelled like an animal in the forest. Pulling back a page, I'd realized I'd not had a real book experience in ages. I've become careless with books, viewing them as throwaways, like H&M clothing. I've been guilty of sacrilige. I've marked them up, hard covers too, with pencil, pen even, as if knowing the sufferable truth; modern books are defamable.

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